Are you living out the purpose God intended for you?

Maybe you’ve spent years searching for clarity, trying to find your unique purpose as a Christian, and it seems like the answers are just out of reach. What if the key was there all along, hidden in plain sight?

IF YOU’VE EVER ASKED “WHAT IS MY PURPOSE?” THIS IS THE EPISODE FOR YOU!

Purpose can feel elusive—especially if you’re multi-passionate and have difficulty choosing just one thing to pursue. However, I’ve learned some key lessons in the search for purpose that I wish I had understood earlier in life. I’m sharing them with you to shorten the window of time it takes for uncovering your purpose.

This episode is a reminder that purpose isn’t something we manufacture—it’s a gift from God. No matter your age or stage, His plans have been woven into your story from the start. Your role is to look for the clues that reveal what He’s had for you all along.

In this episode you’ll learn:

🔥 The types of life events that shape your purpose,
🚧 The five obstacles that can hinder the realization of your purpose, and
👣 Actionable steps you can take as you navigate the discovery of your God-shaped dream.

This episode is for the woman who feels uncertain about her next steps, who wonders if she’s missed her chance, or who simply longs for reassurance that God has a plan for her life. Let this conversation be a reminder that His timing is perfect and your purpose is already unfolding in ways you may not yet see.

Grab the Life Purpose Mapping Exercise, found here: https://www.merrittonsa.com/lifemap to help you find clarity regarding the purpose God has for your life.

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START HERE → with my free guide: 17 Quick-Win Actions to Get Your Dream Moving Forward. It’ll help you build some momentum to keep taking steps toward your dream and discern where to go from there.

Enjoy This One?

Here are some additional episodes with more food for thought on the topic of purpose:

Ep 329: The Truth About Your Unique Purpose as a Christian Apple | Spotify
Ep 276: Find Your Purpose: 12 Steps to Uncover a God-Given Dream Apple | Spotify
Ep 286: Top 3 Traps Standing in the Way of Your God-Given Purpose Apple | Spotify
Ep 300: How to Not Miss God’s Purpose for Your Life w/ Tracey Gates Apple | Spotify

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Dan Pink’s Ted Talk: The Puzzle of Motivation

Grab the Life Purpose Mapping Exercise here: https://www.merrittonsa.com/lifemap

Scripture:

In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him
who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we,
who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory.
~ Ephesians 1:11-12 (NIV)

The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever.
~ Psalm 138:8 (ESV)

PIN IT FOR LATER:

The unedited transcript for this episode of The Devoted Dreamers Podcast follows:

I watched a TED talk recently by Dan Pink. The watching it was recent; the talk was from 2009. But he explained his framework for understanding human motivation. And there were three parts to this. This was a much bigger topic and I can share the whole entire TED talk in the show notes. But his framework for understanding human motivation was three words: autonomy, mastery, and purpose. And I felt like this was very worth sharing with the audience of the Devoted Dreamers podcast.

So autonomy is this urge that we have to direct and lead our own lives. Mastery is a human desire to get better and better at something that matters. And Purpose is a yearning to do what we do in the service of something larger than ourselves.

I don't know if Dan Pink knows the Lord, no clue. And that's not the point. But all of these, this urge to direct our own lives, this desire to get better and better at something that matters, this yearning to do what we do in the service of something larger than ourselves, especially that last one, I feel like is so connected to who God has wired us as his creation. And if you are here listening to this episode, these words and these definitions, I assume they resonate with you like they do with me. We all want to live purposeful lives.

It's not just human. It is innately wired into us as image bearers of the God of the universe. A God shaped dream, I believe, answers the call for each one of those desires. Autonomy to do our own thing, not just for the sake of it, but because we thrive in using our gifts, doing it. Mastery to get good at it so that we can make a difference, so that we can do something that impacts people in the world and Purpose, in service to the Lord, to bring him glory, to enjoy being in his will, to enjoy using the good gifts that he's given us. I feel like these three are all just intertwined. They're inseparable.

And as I read for you last week here on the podcast, Ephesians 1:11-12 in the NIV says this: “In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we who were the first to put our hope in Christ might be for the praise of his glory.”

We exist. We were chosen in him, predestined according to his plan, that we might be for the praise of his glory. It's why we're here, to bring him glory and praise. And one of the ways that we glorify him and enjoy him is using the gifts he's given us.

Today, we are talking about purpose.

I’m your host, Merritt Onsa, a Christian life coach. I’m kind of like the Joanna Gaines for women of faith who have big dreams about how God might reorder the second half of your life so you can use your gifts and life experiences to usher in beauty, redemption, healing and service to others. It’s not a redesign of your home that we’re working on. It’s a brand-new way to live—in freedom, free from fear, free from second guessing yourself all the time, and free from the lies that the enemy has used to keep you quiet and playing small in the past. Isn’t it about time more of us who believe in Christ started living that way?

I’m on a mission to engage 10,000 women worldwide to start taking intentional and purposeful steps that will bring their God-shaped dreams to life. If you believe in Jesus and you see his work in your life and you’re aware that you’ve been given gifts, talents, and a life story that could serve and benefit others, maybe you’re among those 10,000. I hope that you are, because you’re here listening to a podcast about dreams.

Maybe you’re looking for a chance to see if your dream has legs. You want to try it on for size and figure out if it’s possible. You want to be inspired and encouraged that there’s hope for what you’ve been dreaming all these years. Maybe you’ve been too fearful in the past, or someone dashed your dreams with a comment that hit too close to home, or you just haven’t had time to figure out how to proceed.

Well, my friend, this is your time. This is your space. If you have big ideas for how God could use the gifts he’s given you and the years of your life that remain, and you have a dream that would serve others, let’s figure out how to turn that heartfelt hidden dream into real, actionable plans with impact for God’s kingdom work in the world.

Welcome to episode 330 of the Devoted Dreamers podcast.

This is all about what I wish I had known about purpose before turning 40. And I could probably say it's also what I wish I had known before turning 30. But 40 seems like that age of life where things just start to shift a little bit in the way that you think about purpose. And I'm a decade plus older than that now.

And so today I'm gonna share kind of four categories of things that I wish I had more awareness of when I was younger. So whatever your age, this is gonna be helpful for you. And this episode is really geared towards someone who is still looking for clarity about a God-shaped dream. But I still think even if you're fairly clear on what your dream is, there's gonna be some good nuggets in here for you as well.

So, number one thing that I wish I had known before I turned 40 about purpose is that purpose is given by God.

Now, I may have had a glimpse of this, but I didn't understand it then the way that I understand it now. What I talked about in the last episode that, as image bearers, God created us for a reason. He created us to worship him, to bring him glory and enjoy him forever.

I read in the Westminster Shorter Catechism in the last episode that that is our chief purpose in life: to love God and enjoy him forever. I hadn't thought about that, especially before becoming a believer, my life was kind of all about me and what I wanted. And so as we come into our relationship with the Lord, we understand a little bit more that there is a reason that he's put us here and it's not necessarily about us. Yes, we are his image bearers. He's made us unique. He's given us purposeful life for a reason.

In my younger years, I was way wrapped up in “purpose” as far as something that would make me feel good and feel like I had meaning for my life. I think that's a lot of what our world talks about when we think about purpose is personal meaning.

But this one thing that I wish I had known when I was younger is that our purpose comes from God. It's given by him, and it changes how we think about purpose when we know that, that it's from Him.

Number two thing that I wish I had known before I turned 40 about purpose is that the things that I and you feel passionate about, the things that we want to give our lives to, are often shaped by our life experiences, by the things that happened to us or hurts that we had, or you know, milestones that we trudged our way to achieve, or even just like our family of origin or where we grew up or experiences that we had, those things shape our passions and desires. And the other piece of that is that we've been given unique strengths, talents, gifts.

I talked about that a lot in last week's episode number 329 about purpose. That who we are, shaped uniquely by God, informs what we ultimately understand as purpose. What I want to do or be, or who I am, or how I'm wired, or the way those unique little intricacies of who I am, how I'm wired, what I'm passionate about inform what I ultimately think of as a God-shaped dream or something I want to step into and live my life for.

If you want more on that topic, go back and listen to episode 329 and get really into that Life Purpose Mapping Exercise. I think that'll really help you look at some of those things in your life, the things that pour into and inform purpose for you.

Okay, so that's number two. Number one was that our purpose is given by God. Number two is that our purpose is shaped by our life events and our unique strengths and talents. Those are very informative pieces if you're still looking for clarity about your God-shaped dream.

Number three thing that I wish I'd known about purpose before I turned 40 was that it is by looking at those two categories, your life experiences and your specific wiring or your strengths, that is what informs purpose.

In fact, I like to think about this using a Venn diagram where there's three overlapping circles. Not entirely overlapping, but the three circles are who I am/what my strengths are, what my significant life experiences are, and how they've shaped me. And then the third something we talked about last week is the time and place in which I exist. So those life experiences would be completely different if I lived in the 1500s or if I lived in the 2200s—I don't even know how to say that—so when I exist and where is significant. Oh yeah, and if I lived in Europe or if I lived in Russia or if I lived in Africa, it would be different, right? That I would have probably a different lens with which I looked at the world.

So the three pieces of the Venn diagram who I am and what my strengths are, significant life experiences that have shaped me, and the time and place in which I exist. These three parts overlap, and as you see where they connect, that is where you start to get clarity on your God-shaped dream.

I'm gonna share some examples in a minute, but first I'm gonna talk about the number four thing that I wish I had known about purpose before I turned 40. And this is significant because this is the thing that will stand in the way—this, number four—these are the things that will stand in the way of your purpose being realized. And so we've gotta know these things about ourselves and about our life experiences in order to see purpose. But then we also have to get rid of the blocks that keep us from seeing what God has maybe put us on this earth to give our lives to.

So number one, or let me say (a), something standing in the way of your purpose being realized is I don't know who I am. Your identity. If your identity is not secure, that will stand in the way of you understanding or identifying what your purpose is.

Number 2, (b), I don't know what I'm passionate about, I don't know what I care about. I haven't maybe even lived long enough to understand the things that I'm wired to care about.

Number 3, or (c), I don't know where my natural gifting lies. So I haven't done any work to understand my strengths or I haven't been in enough roles to see what those strengths are or had a mentor point them out to me. I don't know my strengths.

Number 4, (d), I have unresolved wounds and/or unconfessed sins.

And then number 5, (e), I don't trust God. I don't see myself as an image bearer. I don't understand my relationship to him in the world. That will definitely stand in the way of you realizing your purpose and seeing that.

So those five things: I don't know who I am, my identity, I don't know what I'm passionate about. I don't know where my natural giftings lie. I have unresolved wounds or unconfessed sin. And I don't trust God or understand my role as his image bearer. These are five significant things that will stand in the way of your purpose being realized. So if you resonated with any of those five things and now realize, okay, I have one of those things standing in the way, what do I do about it? I have a list for you as well.

I recommend you start by confessing the sin. If there is unconfessed sin in your life, start by confessing the sin. And don't do that alone. Invite others into it. There are some great spaces often connected to churches, not always, but programs like AA, Celebrate Recovery, my former church has program called Re:Generation that is now all over the country. Those are great places to meet others who are in a similar boat and need help walking through stuff from their past or their present that they're still working through. So confess the sin.

Seek God's face. Learn about his character. Get into the Word. And just like I said with the last one, don't go alone. Get to know God, who He is, what he says about Himself, what He says about you. Get into a Bible study. Start reading God's Word with a friend. Go to the source and look for the truth.

Third, if you have unresolved wounds from your past or from your present, get help. Find a therapist or a counselor that you can work with. Go to one of those programs that I talked about a minute ago. Find places where you can bring your unresolved wounds, your unhealed, your open gashes into the light for God to heal those things in your life.

Then, once you've done those things, or if those things are not barriers for you, learn about who you are. Learn about your identity in Christ. Learn about your identity as an image bearer of God. This kind of echoes the second one, but get into the Word and see what God says about who you are. Start asking questions. Pray, journal.

Once you have begun to understand—it's a difficult thing to understand fully—but once you've begun to understand who you are in Christ, then you can work on the exercise from last week's episode number 329 about your passions and your strengths, the life mapping, going back and looking at all the things that have influenced who you are today.

Then after you've dealt with unconfessed sin, with unresolved wounds, with misunderstanding of God's character, a lack of trust for him, learning about your identity in Christ. Then you can go do that activity on your passions and your strengths and come to some conclusions and find some themes about the passions, the purpose, that God has given you.

I said I would give you some examples of ways that our life experiences and our unique strengths can shape God-shaped dreams. So I've got a couple for you:

1. Maybe you were or have, have in the past, or currently have a role, whether that's in a working situation or in your family or in schooling. But maybe you were a part of a really male-dominated organization, one that consistently diminished women or maybe spoke to you like you were a little girl, one that just lacked respect for who you were. Or maybe you were mentored by strong nurturing women or men who did respect and honor women. Either one of those—so kind of the more negative or the more positive experience—could lead to a passion, an ambition, or a God-shaped dream where you care deeply about young girls being uplifted, knowing their value and worth, and being empowered to use their gifts in the world. Either negative or positive experience could shape a God-shaped dream for you.

Or maybe your life, or someone you love, has faced a ton of medical challenges, health issues, being in and out of hospitals or treatments, kind of ongoing difficulty related to physical health could shape a God-shaped dream around helping others experiencing similar health issues, like becoming a patient advocate or serving in an organization that helps people managing difficult health situations.

And then those were two life experiences. Here's one about strengths: If you have empathy and restorative strengths and you regularly find yourself giving of yourself, whether that's in caregiving roles or supporting others or volunteering, you find yourself in roles like that. This could provide some clues to the shape and form your dream might take. Thinking about who are the types of people that you love to serve and care for, what are the ways, like the specific actions and things that you really enjoy engaging with in a more empathetic or restorative role? Those things can shape what your God-shaped dream is.

So when you know who you are, a beloved child of God, when you know you are here for a purpose, that you exist for a reason in this time and place because God made you for that time and place and he gave you specific gifts and he allowed certain life experiences. When you have examined those past events of your life or those experiences that have shaped you, all of those things provide clarity for the direction of a God-shaped dream. That plus your unique strengths will inform how you run after this dream. That is when purpose starts to become clear.

Father in Heaven, I lift up this friend listening to my voice in this moment. One who is seeking clarity or has some clarity and is seeking next steps. Lord, I pray for her that if there is unconfessed sin, if there are still wounds from her past, if there is a misunderstanding of who you are, your character, or her identity, Lord, I pray that you would begin now to work, to rectify, to heal, to mend, to redeem—that nothing about our passions, our ambitions, our God-shaped dreams even really matter if these barriers between us and you are still standing in the way.

So, Lord, I pray for your redemptive healing work in her life. I pray, God, that you would offer insight and wisdom and correction and direction for the woman hearing this episode and seeking to know you more fully and to know herself more clearly, that you would guide and direct the passions and the dreams you've put on her heart.

We thank you, Lord, for your love for us and pray it in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Next week, I'm thrilled to welcome my friend Jill Felix to the podcast. She is a Core Clarity facilitator and we're going to talk about her stepping into this specific role of helping other people discover their strengths and their talents and see how the way that God has wired them has uniquely positioned them for certain roles in the world. So we're gonna talk about Jill's dream.

We're gonna talk about how she got to her dream, but specifically we're gonna talk about core strengths. And this is gonna be a fascinating conversation. So if you've ever taken the Clifton Strengths Finder, go pull out your results before Jill and I share this episode. Go look at that. Go do some reading about your strengths if you're unfamiliar or it's been a long time. I think I took mine like 25 years ago, but the results held. They're still relevant today.

Come on back for those two episodes at the end of March. They're going to be fabulous and connect beautifully to this conversation of life experiences and unique strengths shaping our God-shaped dreams.

My friends, tune in every week. Like I said, this is going to be a weekly show this year. Invite your friends. Share this episode and mostly trust God’s guidance for the dream that He has given you.

Finally, Daughter of the King, you were made for a beautiful purpose. Your identity and security rest in him, as does your dream, because the Lord is good and his ways are always good. No weapon formed against you will prosper because you belong to Him.

Until next week, stay faithful, keep dreaming. And remember, trusting God with your next step doesn’t mean it isn’t going to be scary. It means taking the step anyway. That’s what faith is.

You are welcome here among women braving those scary steps in faith, knowing our dreams matter because they are His.

Until next time, I’m Merritt Onsa, your dream coach and sister in Christ walking by faith with you in the dream.

Have a great week.

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